You know what we’re talking about.
Perhaps it’s something that showed up late night on cable, or which the local horror host introduced, or that was on the dollar rental shelf at the video place, pretending to be something far grander that it really was. But they’re out there, lurking in the darkness and trying to lure in unsuspecting viewers.
We’re talking about those many ultra-low budget retro horror and sf films made by enthusiastic, if often amateurish, outsiders.
Which doesn’t say they can’t be fun if you can accept their limitations.
The usual mad scientist’s latest experiment hasn’t worked out so well, and he’s lost control of the fishman he made as the ultimate weapon. But it’s okay, instead he’ll revive Frankenstein’s original monster. He shouldn’t have any trouble controlling that.
But, of course, we have to throw in the usual collection of innocents to get caught in all the mad science. So why not a photographer and his team sent down to do a photo shoot for a girly mag? If nothing else, it gives us an excuse to throw in a lot of good looking girls in swimsuits.
Of course, as in most of these, all the beautiful girls get murdered. It’s a bit disturbing when you think of it. I was a little surprised that this one actually had a bit of nudity, which is less common in a film like this. Now, there is a monster rampage at a strip club, complete with a pole dancer who ends up naked. Considering how many girls shed their clothes in this one, I do have to wonder if some real world strip club was involved in the production.
It is worth noting that both monsters look better than one might expect. The scuplting of the latex masks and the details like the gillman’s teeth are all well done. You never forget that they are masks, of course, but then, this production never had that kind of money.
As this is that sort of production, Troma’s Lloyd Kaufman makes a cameo that was obviously shot with no one else around.
Most of the jokes fall rather flat, as does the attempt at romance. The mad science somehow gets mixed in with the whole military/industrial complex thing, which is…well, let’s face it, your typical mad scientist isn’t exactly a candidate for a grant from DARPA. For that matter, most mad scientists don’t say, oh, we just need you to stay here a day or so so we can finish our work and get away. After all, for most mad scientists, we’d expect the next line to be “you be the work.”
However, the monster battles are more or less okay, in a late Universal Studios “House of” sort of way, and I’ll admit I liked the ghost of the original Dr. Frankenstein showing up, even if I don’t buy his Jedi powers.
So if you watch this one, you know what you’re getting, although it might help if you thought of it as a girly attempt to remake not House of Dracula, but, say, the Ritz Brothers’ The Gorilla…
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The Rivets Zone: The Best SF Movies You’ve Never Seen!
rivets on the poster 