Body in the Web [Ein Toter hing im Netz] (1960)

(aka Horrors of Spider Island, Girls of Spider Island,

It’s Hot in Paradise, The Spider’s Web)

Okay, so some movies do deserve the MST3K treatment.  I’ll admit that.

For most of its brief running time, Horrors of Spider Island offers us girls.

They dance, spin, show off their legs and even strip (just a little) to audition for a touring dance company on its way to Singapore.  After they get stranded on a desert island, they take off their blouses because of the heat, shower, sunbathe, go swimming in their underwear, compete with each other to dress up as island girls (mostly in their underwear), and, of course, have a few catfights.

I guess they thought they needed something else to fill out their running time (besides the big fist fight between their rescuers), so they have to deal with a nasty giant spider – and then the only man in the group gets bitten, turns into a spiderman, and starts strangling people.

Between all the sunbathing and skinny-dipping, naturally.

There’s a lot of talk about there being Uranium on the island, although they never take the time to say (explicitly) that the giant (well, it’s pretty darn big.  Bigger than a Schnauzer) spider is a mutant caused by the all too familiar effects of cinematic radiation.  But we all should take the warning to heart that getting bitten by a radioactive spider does not always work out!

Supposedly, this German made film was originally an “adult” feature, and the version seen here had the nudity cut out.  Even with the nudity, it must have been a fairly tame sort of offering.

However, it does have one redeeming moment, when they enter the cabin and find a giant spider web spun across one end of the room and a man hanging in it.

Nicely creepy.  Too bad the rest of the movie wasn’t up to that standard.




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