The Rise of the Robots (2015)

This one starts so well.

First we have the Voyager spacecraft, crashing on a planet of alien robots, who naturally interpret it as an attack from Earth.  They take off in their fleet of flying saucers and begin their attack on us.

Of course, the robots are silly and toy-like, the Earth is a plainly labeled globe, complete with stand, the saucers only marginally better than pie-plates, and a faux-scratched and damaged film effect superimposed on everything.  It’s silly, yes, but they obviously were having a lot of fun when they did it.

Unfortunately, the human characters eventually show up and the film never recovers.

This is one of the slew of low-budget indies Amazon offers as part of their “Amazon Video” streaming service.  It is also, obviously, a college project, as it’s set on Campus down in Texas.  For all that it’s supposed to be a world-wide robot conquest, we see little more than same four locations over and over again (except for those glimpses of the “Robot News Network” (RNN) which are almost as much goofy fun as the opening)

It badly needed to be trimmed down by at least twenty minutes or so, but it’s mostly amusing and mostly not too tedious, although the whole “stoner is the chosen one” thing is far too familiar and the “dude, dude, like dude” thing goes on far, far too long.  Far, far, far too long.

It’s also nice to see the whole Mayan calendar thing get mocked (with a nice little dig towards the end, with the guy who carved the calendar saying that he stopped because he got tired).  However, they must have been trying to win some sort of prize for the most after-the-credits sequences, which go on forever and include several bits cleverer than most of what’s on display in the rest of the film.

Oh, and yeah, the one thing you do need to know:  that cool image of a giant robot holding a girl from the posters?  It never happens in the film. Not even close. In fact, the robots barely interact with the human players.

Which is a pity.  That would have been a far more interesting film.

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