Cyborg X (2016)

Sometimes you just have to shake your head at the sinister evil plot.

Okay, so you’re planning to prevent something…by causing it to happen?

Ummmm….did I miss something here?

At any rate, this one was put out by Arrowstorm, who have been making SF and fantasy films using Kickstarter campaigns.  They’re basically a bunch of fanboys making copies of the kinds of films they like.  They’ve done the series of Mythica high fantasy films, Survivor, one of their earlier efforts, hearkened back to the sorts of action SF made in the 70s (with hints of Mad Max), while this one is more or less one of those Post-Apocalyptic nomads vs. Cyborgs sort of films from the 90s.

The opening is one of the best parts of the film, with a Resident Evil style narration (and the usual surprise, surprise reveal that the masked nomad is, in fact, a good looking girl.  Well, it would be a surprise if she weren’t narrating).

So we’ve got bare-chested guys with ugly face masks as the cyborgs, who are somehow bulletproof, even Vulcan-minigun-at-point-blank-range bulletproof.

Except when it’s inconvenient.

Truth be told, it’s all a bit flat, with so-so acting and a so-so script.  It hints at possible issues which would have complicated the relatively straight-forward story line, but no one ever seems all that interested in any of them and they just lie around more-or-less half-digested.

A lot of people have pegged Danny Trejo’s appearance as a highlight, but the truth is he spends most of the running time smoking a big Calabash pipe and gets one scene of cyborg fighting action before valiantly – and economically – getting killed off early.

Oh well.  It is what it is.  And it isn’t terrible.

Just flat.

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